Advice on Child rearing by Mother of Eight. Email question to ivorytowergroup@gmail.com. Will post question and answer on website.

Here's some general, practical tips and advice:

Love, love, love your children

Love them, make sacrifices for them, tell them you love them, hug them. Let them know how unique and wonderful they are, listen to them.

Trust your OWN instincts

Relax! You are the mother, father or caretaker of this child Our Lord has put you in charge. Look inside yourself. If you have the child's best interest at heart, you know what to do.

Don't read too many childrearing magazines

They tend to make you believe that you don't know what you're doing, when you do.

Your children are not in charge

Being a parent is a benevolent dictatorship. Listen to your children's objections, problems, needs and desires and give them appropriate choices, but let them know that they are most definitely not in charge. Children will love it that they are not, even though they will not always thank you for it. It's really too much for them to be in charge of themselves.

Be interrupted by them

Be happily interrupted by them (as much as you can stand it) for they should also learn that sometimes Mom or Dad (and this will translate to others) need space. So, if you can't take being interrupted by them for the umpteenth time, patiently explain that you just need some space to not have to talk and to be quiet in your own mind or some such thing. Spending time when they come to you is the best time you have together. Even if it's only for a minute, the child will remember it as more. It is part of your job title to be interrupted by them.

Be unpopular

Be indifferent as to whether your child hates you or loves you today, just always keep the child's best interests at heart---AS YOU SEE IT---not as they see it. Tomorrow or next week, sometimes even the next minute, will find your child in a different mood. Don't ride the roller coaster of their many moods.

When you tell them what to do

When you tell them they must do something or else, you MUST back it up. Don't let laziness, embarassment or your child's several "I hate you" exclamations creep in and ruin it. If you think it's appropriate tell them the whys and wherefores of your decision, however don't worry because it's not always appropriate. Mostly, they know.

Plan family time together

What comes out of loving family time together creates the very backbone of healthy relationships in other areas of society.

You are not perfect and neither is your child

Live, love, learn and pray together. It's hard. You can't always do all the advice on this page. Sometimes you feel like you can't do any of it. Just keep trying. Persevere and God will help you. Children are very flexible, and forgiving. If you are trying to do what's right and you love them, they will also continue to try to do what's right and love you, too.

Pray DAILY even if it's only for one minute

Any daily prayer from your heart to God will be most helpful. Because I'm Catholic, I say a Hail Mary every day that the Blessed Mother will help me to be a good mother. The Blessed Mother has been a trememdous help because she has been a mother herself. Since she is the spiritual Mother of everyone---not just Catholics, I know that she can help you, too. Here is her prayer:

Hail Mary
Full of Grace
The Lord is with thee
Blessed art thou among women
And blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus

Holy Mary
Mother of God
Pray for us sinners
Now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.